It’s almost 5:30am and I’ve been awake for over an hour. The pain is excruciating. I can’t think straight and I can barely function. I’m guessing all this is a combination of my wild adventure over the weekend and the cold weather coming in. Whatever the reason I’m not a very happy person right now. Writing always seems to help me deal with everything that’s going on in my life. Thank God for that. If it wasn’t for that I would probably wouldn’t even write anymore and that’s just a sad thought.
When I’m hurting like this I try to think of all the happy things in my life and not dwell on the the pain or the other frustrating symptoms of my illness. I’m so blessed to have awesome parents who have helped me out so much, especially financially. They don’t exactly understand and accept my illness, but that’s a work in progress. I’m thankful for the rest of my family who always seem to be there at the right times. I have to single out my oldest niece in this. She drives me crazy sometimes, but that girl can make me laugh like no one else can and laughter is so important when you’re dealing with a chronic illness. My friends are awesome. They’re always there when I need them and they’re there when I don’t need them. The ones that are really there for me know who they are. One in particular has had to listen to a lot of complaining, bitching and crying over the years. She’s the one that will call me when I’m in a bad flare and wake me up just to make sure I’m ok. I wonder if she knows how much that means to me? Another one is a very new part of my life and he always knows the right thing to say when I’m feeling bad. Sometimes I feel like he gets inside my head because he seems to say everything I want to hear and he has this awesome ability to make a really bad day turn into a good one. Just thinking about him now has me smiling, but that’s a whole different story.
So anyway…To all the people in my life who are there for me and support me, Thank you! I wouldn’t be alive today if it wasn’t for you. You guys give me the strength to keep going, especially when I get to that point that I just want to give up. I love all of you bunches and bunches!
