All my life I have tried to please everyone around me at the
expense of my happiness and well-being.
I tried to judge my happiness on the happiness of others and I thought I
was happy, but the truth was I had no idea what being happy really felt like. I was just going through these motions and I
just kept hoping to make it out alive. I
let people walk all over me, because that was easier and took less energy than
standing up for myself.
I woke up, I stood up and decided that everyone else needed
to shut up and get the hell out of my way because it was my turn to live…my
turn to be happy. I’m pissing people off
left and right, but I don’t care. They
can all kiss my ass, because I’ve been kissing their asses for way too long. I’m
going to follow through with my dreams and I’m going to hold my head up high
and show this world what this chick is made of. No more hiding behind my illnesses. No more being ashamed of being sick.
I make mistakes like everyone else does and my mistakes are
not any worse than everybody else’s so don’t try to make me feel like they
are. It’s only because I’ve always been
the good one, the one who followed all the rules and the one who looked out for
everyone else. That was all cool until I
realized no one was looking out for me.
So I’m done. It’s all about me
now. Call me selfish, call me a bitch
and yes you can even call me a whore. It’s
not going to hurt me because I know who I am and I know what I’m made of. Maybe someday you’ll figure out who you are.