Thursday, January 19, 2012

Stepping Out of the Comfort Zone


I let my illness control my life for so long that I became comfortable with letting it do so.  If I was afraid to do something then I would convince myself that my illness wouldn’t allow me to do it.  This became my comfort zone.  This is where I was more content.  I stopped actively pursuing my dreams because I didn’t want to fail.  The thought of failure terrified me.  It was easier to blame everything on my illness and hide from the world.

This place I was in, my comfort zone, became extremely lonely.  I was safe from failure, but I had no fulfillment in my life.  Every day was the same as the one before.  I was stuck in a rut, a routine that I hated, but I stayed there because I knew what to expect from it and that gave me comfort.  At that point in my life it was better to stay in that comfort zone and be miserable than to risk the heartache of failure.  I can’t do this.  I can’t do that. I can’t….I can’t….I can’t.  This became a huge part of my vocabulary and of my life.

I convinced myself that I couldn’t do things without even trying to do them.  I made excuse after excuse until I experienced the one thing I was trying to avoid…FAILURE.  I felt like a failure.  I felt that I didn’t have anything to show for my life.  I had done absolutely nothing.  I decided right then that I would rather try something and fail rather than never trying at all.  Read More...

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